A Hanky Full Of Chissum

by Mike Schnee

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Sebastian A. Bach
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Sebastian A. Bach It's such a rare feat to embody multiple distinct musical personalities so organically as Mike does. Wormstew has tons of their own songs and also covers Chissum and Pussy Cow songs. And then Chissum has tons of songs too, of which a small fraction are represented on this delightfully weird record. All these versions of all these songs self-evidently need to exist and be heard although they're all written by the same guy. I feel very fortunate to know him and his music. Favorite track: Sir Yabba Dabba Dabba Con Carne McWhistler.
John Brownell
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John Brownell From the mind, er... *stomach* of Wormstew comes this collection of songs released under the moniker Chissum Worthington. The 20 songs included on this collection are mostly short, fun, comical, and *hungry*. While the lyrics are often silly, there is no lack of musicianship on this effort. As I listen I find myself surprised, often, at a chord change or arrangement choice. "I'm admitting to the world that I am cray," indeed! Never stop! Favorite track: Cricket In The Grass.
Get Set Go
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Get Set Go Choosing a favorite song on this album is like going into a pet store filled with adorable puppies and ranking them. Like, maybe, I can find a favorite. But, frankly, they're puppies and all adorable.

This album fills me with so much joy. It is hilarious, fun, joyful, ribald, subversive, and magical. It's like what I imagine R. Crumb would sound like if he made music and not art. Does that make sense?

It is brilliant. Just brilliant. Happy listening! Thank you, Chissum! Favorite track: Woompie Womp, The Wibble.
ericlea
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ericlea Fans of Chissum Worthington will certainly not be disappointed by this long-awaited collection of delightful absurdism and cheerfully misguided eroticism. Non-fans of Chissum Worthington WILL be disappointed that they were not previously fans of Chissum Worthington, but will NOT be disappointed in the fact that they have BECOME fans of Chissum Worthington thanks to this album of songs by the great and powerful Chissum Worthington. Favorite track: Cricket In The Grass.
eclipso23
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Teresa Cowles
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stephenschnee
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shneebop
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castinwax
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Michael Simmons
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1.
Chissum Nation 02:33
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Check your mail, you’ve got an invitation Come on down to chissum nation Pay to park but park next to me You’ll get your dollars worth, I guarantee I’m the cool dawg daddy sensation The president of chissum nation I’m the king and i got the power I’m the sweet, baby i’m the sour Yes you and your friends Can be citizens of chissum nation Time off request for your vacation Take the winnebago to chissum nation Bring your napkins and your dental floss We got baby back ribs in bbq sauce Gonna be your final destination Kicking it cool in chissum nation Come what now and come whenever Join the chissum nation endeavour Yes you and your friends Can be citizens of chissum nation
2.
Washing My Hands 00:23
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Washing my hands, getting all the fingers Scrubbing my thumb, cause the dirt there lingers i got this soap that's making foam And this hot water needs a home, so I'll be Washing my hands getting all the fingers Chimichurri Chimichurri-co
3.
Gozegus Plummy 01:35
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I aint no dummy My life aint crummy My bubble is gummy They call me Gozegus Plummy Come with me on a walkabout I got my hole in the one and there aint no doubt Eyes wide open to collect all the balls Balls, i said balls. I said balls. I aint no dummy I love gin and rummy My bubble is gummy They call me Gozegus Plummy Grab your club and pick your poison Add some of yer sauce, preferably hoisin It’s par for the course when you fly over walls And balls. I said balls, i said balls. I aint no dummy i wimm and wummy My bubble is gummy They call me Gozegus Plummy
4.
Ding Dang Doodle 01:28
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she gave a note to me that’s what i like to see confident and curious i read it with my eyes I multiplied in size i hope she is serious Ding dang doodle, ring my bell i took my pen in hand not knowing where I stand what might be my reply i thought about it, then i threw away my pen what did that girl imply? Ding dang doodle, ring my bell
5.
Lip Smacking 01:19
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Come one come all, let’s have a ball You my baby doll, lip smacking Come up come down, put on your party gown We’re gonna hit the town, lip smacking The tension in the room was getting weird Then Kevin (from Midway) tugged on his beard Then “poof”, you’re nekkid. Poof, don’t wreck it Poof, that sure is a magical beard I want a slice, put you on ice Sing lullabyes, then lip smacking Come one, come all, you my baby doll Anytime at all, lip smacking The people, they got nervous but then they cheered When Kevin, from Midway, tugged on his beard Then poof, you’re mine, poof, you’re fine And poof, wow that really is a magical beard Come one come all, let’s have a ball You my baby doll, lip smacking Come up come down, put on your party gown We’re gonna hit the town, lip smacking
6.
Woompie Womp, The Wibble 01:26
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Woompy Womp, the Wibble Woompy Womp, the Wibble A friend of mine La la la It was in the morning After the bacon and eggs It came without a warning With furry arms and rubber legs Woompy Womp, the Wibble Woompy Womp, the Wibble A friend of mine La la la I never kissed a wibble Up until that day I may have taken a nibble From where i shouldn’t say Woompy Womp, the Wibble Woompy Womp, the Wibble A friend of mine La la la
7.
Chicken Chow Mein 00:57
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I just saw a happy space ship land I just saw the happy face space man I shook hands with the happy face space man I broke bread with the happy face space man Chicken chow mein, she’s my pretty girl She drives me insane, chicken chow mein Chicken chow mein, she’s my pretty girl She drives me insane, chicken chow mein I just saw a happy space ship land I just saw the happy face space man I shook hands with the happy face space man I broke bread with the happy face space man Chicken chow mein, she’s my pretty girl She drives me insane, chicken chow mein Chicken chow mein, she’s my pretty girl She drives me insane, chicken chow mein
8.
Cover That Pie Hole 00:54
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Cover that pie hole, baby Cover that sniffing nose Cover that face with a mask then maybe We can wiggle our butt and tip our toes I guess what i’m saying is i won’t dance with you unless you wear a face covering Cuz when you cough, you won’t believe all the stuff i see that’s hovering Cover that pie hole, baby Cover that sniffing nose Cover that face with a mask then maybe We can wiggle our butt and tip our toes
9.
Cricket In The Grass 02:42
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Sit, sit Sittin’ in the sunshine I hear a cricket in the grass Sip sip Sipping on a jug o wine And chewin’ on some sassofrass Cuz i’m hungry And i’m cool I wore dungeries When i went to school I’m admitting to the world that i am cool I’m admitting to the world that i am cool Plop plop The ketchup on a burger Then spread it all around the bun Drop drop My tears for world hunger Those people they don’t have no fun Switching gears now Cuz i’m cray It’s been years and it’s been like a day I’m admitting to the world that i am cray I’m admitting to the world that i am cray A cricket in the grass, a jug of sipping wine Ketchup on my burger and i’m doing fine Chink chink My pennies hit the table My pockets have no need for them Wink wink My eyeballs are unstable As if they’re hanging from the stem Back and forth Slamming into my face Put em back cuz they’re taking up space My eyeballs are taking up space My eyeballs are taking up space A cricket in the grass, a jug of sipping wine Ketchup on my burger and i’m doing fine
10.
Stop, Baby, Don't 01:38
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Everybody sing a song for little Luna Everybody eat a salad made of tuna I think I will skip the mayonnaise Everybody pick a fight with Valentino Everybody see a film with Al Pacino I think mine will be Carlito’s Way Stop, baby, mmm I’m telling you Goo goo baby i’m done with babba dabba doo Stop, baby, don’t and listen Goo goo ga ga gooka lika doggy doo Everybody raise your hand and give me high five Everybody come and see the car that I drive I pretend that it’s a Maserati Everybody sing a song for little Luna Give her a cookie or a clown or a balloona She’s too young for Kung Fu and Karate Stop, baby, mmm I’m telling you Goo goo baby i’m done with babba dabba doo Stop, baby, don’t and listen Goo goo ga ga gooka lika doggy doo
11.
No More Macaroni 00:31
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No more macaroni baby No more macaroni baby No more macaroni baby yeah yeah yeah No more macaroni baby No more macaroni baby No more macaroni baby yeah yeah yeah I ate it No more macaroni baby No more macaroni baby No more macaroni baby yeah yeah yeah
12.
Kitty Con Carne 01:12
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Kitty con carne Come, kitty come crawling to me Kitty con carne Come on, Coco Cooley and the Cocoa Bean I got the pickle, let’s make a relish Give me a tickle just to embellish This kiss Kitty con carne Come, kitty come crawling to me Kitty con carne Come on, Coco Cooley and the Cocoa Bean I got the oil, you go the sauce pan It’s set to boil and bubble up what we can Then we’ll kiss Kitty con carne Come, kitty come crawling to me Kitty con carne Come on, Coco Cooley and the Cocoa Bean
13.
Poppin' The Popcorn 01:17
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Step one pop the popcorn step two sing a song about the popcorn step three eat the popcorn and life will be kickin’ right here on this earth our mouths filled with wonder and butter and mirth popping the popcorn get down (wow) popping the popcorn get down (wow) popping the popcorn popping the popcorn step 4 here are my fingers step 5 here’s my tongue step 6 three the butter lingers and life will be fun as i write in my journal son of a gun a do pop a mean kernal popping the popcorn get down (wow) popping the popcorn get down (wow) popping the popcorn popping the popcorn
14.
Sir Yabba Dabba Dabba Con Carne McWhistler 01:30
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I got a fork and a knife and a menu called life and some butter for my bread I’m feeling like a winner as I gaze upon my dinner Gonna eat it till i’m dead I’m sir yabba dabba dabba con carne mcwhistler Also known as kingsley You best get out of my way girl, cuz i’m cool Cuz i’m cool I got a car that I drive and I get a high five From the girls out on the street My appetite is kickin’ I like corn and I like chicken They make everything complete I’m sir yabba dabba dabba con carne mcwhistler Also known as kingsley You best get out of my way girl, cuz i’m cool Cuz i’m cool
15.
Taquitos 01:23
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Taquitos Mama like Papa like Burritos My baby like Ooh, my baby like Burritos go into the oven, 350 Taquitos in the frying pan, so tasty We do a little “boomba dinga” and it’s bitchin’ We turn around and go back into the kitchen Taquitos Mama like Papa like Burritos My baby like Ooh, my baby like I left my salsa bowl somewhere out in Modesto I learned a magic trick to get it back, presto For all is sacred and all is holy When i fill that bowl with guacamole Taquitos Mama like Papa like Burritos My baby like Ooh, my baby like
16.
Cricket La Rue 01:50
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here’s a cool cat dooby dog Silly willy wally pog After dinner, minty cool Living by the golden rule Cricket LaRue Lipstick, maybe not Picking at a tater tot After dinner, creme brulee The decadence is on the way Cricket LaRue Cricket LaRue, there’s nothing better to do Than to breath in the air that belongs to me and you And it’s so cool Standing there, innocent She only came to represent Hip shake, belly ache It must have been the coffee cake Cricket LaRue Talk back, she never does Never mean and that’s because After party, zing zang Everything - the whole shebang Cricket LaRue
17.
Tina 00:47
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Banana Then we kiss, TIna Yeah, we kiss, Tina Banana Then we kiss, Tina Yeah, we kiss, Tina (and the rest is up to you)
18.
Wiener Whoops 01:07
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wiener wiener whoops wiener wiener whoops wiener wiener whoopsisdoo wiener wiener whoops wiener wiener whoops wiener wiener whoopsisdoo
19.
Johnny Pumpkin Circus 02:00
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Johnny pumpkin and the ballerina Are bringing their show to the sports arena There’ll be cats and coronas and a clown The Johnny Pumpkin Circus is coming to town The big tip is the big top is a fabulous event A trapeze made of jugglers in a saw dustesque-like tent A donkey, nay, a monkey with his finger up his nose A cowboy with a dummy that’s been drinking, and it shows Johnny pumpkin and the ballerina Are bringing their show to the sports arena There’ll be cats and coronas and a clown The Johnny Pumpkin Circus is coming to town The Hendersons will all be there, panang on a paper plate The lion with the open mouth will decide that one dude’s fate The hot dogs and taquitos, they’ll be dangling of your chin Along with bits of Fritos and some candy from Berlin Johnny pumpkin and the ballerina Are bringing their show to the sports arena There’ll be cats and coronas and a clown The Johnny Pumpkin Circus is coming to town
20.
The Plight Of Clowns 01:33
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Clowns are funny with the smile they got They say they’re made of money But i know they’re not They’re made of flesh and blood and clown paint Like you and me, we’re made of most of that Like you and me, we’re made of most of that Clowns don’t travel on the money they earn Their plans unravel And they never learn They’re made of flesh and blood and clown paint Like you and me, we’re made of most of that Like you and me, we’re made of most of that

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released May 9, 2023

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Mike Schnee Long Beach, California

I write and record songs under the moniker Wormstew and Chissum Worthington. I've got a ton of songs and I'm putting them in packs of 4, in no particular order. Some songs date from the late 90's. Some are pretty fresh. I've mixed them all up.There will also be new stuff, obviously. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do! ... more

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